Author: Amelia Victrix

Hi Diary Been a while yeah? Honestly lately it seems like I start writing to you and then halfway through I get stuck and can’t quite finish it. I’m getting worse but that’s part of the rehab. At least that’s what I tell myself, obviously I can’t hold these feelings for months. I still am…

Heyhey Diary, It’s nice to speak with you again, after all so much went down since, I nuked things and set things back in a reasonable place, well I say reasonable because I of course had to figure out what was going on within me, I felt those same feelings well up again, those same…

Hi Diary, I wish I could say that the post I had in mind matches the one that I’m typing now but ultimately, unfortunately, it does not. I had it in mind a few days ago I would hop on here, spilling a happy diatribe, do my best and move on. Maybe I need my…

Hey Diary, been a while since I said hi. Sure I mean it’s only been a few days but it feels like those were a month in my head. I broke down again, you know why. Sometimes it feels like I’m having to compete against the world, even the act of finding help becomes a…

Hey Diary, let’s talk, you and me. Frankly we both know what’s coming and obviously this is the DMS that we come back to, we try things the normal way, find it totally unbearable and go back to our way. Each time progress is made, each time a new chapter and ultimately things only turn…

Hey Diary, it’s so funny yesterday it felt like the words were all flowing really well, I guess listening to the pillows always puts me in a big writing mood, I think Kinokoteikoku might still but honestly maybe that’s passed, doubtful ultimately. Isn’t it funny how life is this thing where sometimes you go back…

Flowing riverToo much water to bearLack of OxygenA thousand sliversStory covered, againPoignant wordsMarred by sandSediment and gritTar and vinesDraw what you seeNot what you thinkPulling blanksCrushing white capsulesWeighing point oh fourTedious and backbreakingLifetime choreRepeat every 10 daysDo it some moreRemoval of the ritualRemoval of anotherMy sibling never be an uncleDamage has already been doneHelpful source…

Awar was going on and we were checking the backs of trucks for misconfigured equipment, wifi antennas with bad ips and ports. I remember fireworks too. Nintendo started putting intrusive Ads in video games, much to many gamers ire, eventually Microsoft put in ads of its own, mocking Mario, mocking prices, etc. There was something…

Ultimately the irony doesn’t escape me. I think now is the point when I’ve felt like I’m able to control things more. For such a long time I was tied to the notions that I reacted to stimuli, rather than control my self. I think I did this because of fear and also because I…

Hey Diary, seems like lately I’m back in the swing of writing in you again, honestly maybe inwards the only way to go right now because it feels like everyone left me. Every conversation goes no where, the words don’t process or people just play games with me. I’m not really sure what I did,…