Category: Archived

And here I am, the difference between the ideal and real me waning every day. The costume and the being slowly growing greyer, not a dreamer but a doer, someone actually putting forth the effort. My flaws becoming open but also gifts. My curses, my tools. The question no longer whether I’d be anything, but…

Cold carpet, warm embrace. Pillow pressed harshly against my face. Paranoid the same spike on awareness. Only makes me hate this place. Desire to trust, desire to love. Therapy not supplying preparedness. Lots of ideation, lack of a desire to eat, distancing myself in case I can’t get a hug. Brooding over nothing, punishing myself,…

Two defining traits wound themselves tightly across every drop of rain that formed a day. Some days bright, others dark. Fingers point to circumstance, DNA, chemicals. Every breakdown, a new finger to point. Therapy over USB, connecting trauma from you to me. An ear that hears too much, preventing what I need to be. Scraping…

I’m creating a new world One that I hope you’ll enjoy Flexing creative muscles New mindsets to employ Trying to stay positive Extendng my social reach Removing every leech Maybe I’m glorifying a detox binge but I haven’t felt this good in years Doing all that I desired Moving all my gears I hope you’ll…

I’m thinking about death. I’m thinking about paper trails. I’m thinking about blind typing. When I go would there be an investigation? Would my S.O. follow clues? Watch every blu-ray left behind? Chase what little social media I had? Would he ask friends about me? Interact and learn? Would he try to find my ghost in my past? Try to grasp every ounce of my…

I’m happy my format is gone I’m happy hyperlinks are broken things are better then ever they took the media too i’m really really progressing even my avi is gone i’m proud of myself i don’t think anyone reads this I’m just so much better than i’d ever have hoped thanks for making the Internets grave you scumbags April 29th, 2019 11:05pm

Trapped in a bubble Floating on the surface Tensions waning Crashing as I lie You criticize me Advertise me Gave me pockets of lies Come inside Sit down and chat Take back everything you lack Vent your frustrations Adorations I’m begging you to take it back Push lead through the back I’m asking I’m pleading No more pain No more guilt Bad memory quilts Detoriate Rot Lie me in the mahogony cot I swear I’m good to…

They went to delve inside the depths of the astrological cave searching for hidden treasures, setting off traps, being brave.Foraging for fire, captivated by their discovery, manufactured high rise buildings to catalyze their recovery. Communication was stiff, needed to be improved, wired their ears to walls, then came monsoons.So another improvement, walls on the go, carried…

Every day after school, door slam for an entry on an exit. Left the whole world behind, entered a new one unaffected. Right with the other side not alone, accomplished objective. Every single day, hour after hour. Daydream of each other, even in the shower. Meds made appetite off-kilter, but you kept my life perfect through a filter. Never a day alone, never a day depressed. Took a tech…

Your panic attacks mean nothing. That’s what they show you, as their actions reverberate through your skull. Your depression means nothing, as the film grain is applied to the things you call memories, everything’s fuzzy and you feel so alone. Even though you have to share a home. I’m not a fan of this new nature we made…